Shop

All stickers INCLUDE postage to anywhere in the world.

These have only been ordered in limited numbers for now, and when in stock will be dispatched within 1 week.

If we run out and need to produce more, then they will take up to 10 days for dispatch (probably sooner)

*They stick best on glossy and flatter surfaces – don’t try to go around corners or anything to angled.

Jizz Machine Colours

 

Jizz Machine CARBON! £10.99

The ultimate Jizz statement this season. Be the envy of your stupid friends with this carbon fibre* delight

*not real carbon clearly – i can probably do it but will costing mucho dollar.

Quick note on these carbon ones – due to the material they are best suited to stick on flat, clean and smooth surfaces as they dont bend well and the texture means the glue is perhaps not quite as strong as the other more flexible decals.

carbon_jizz

 

Jizz Machine WHITE £7.99

The Original Jizz.

white

 

Jizz Machine GREEN £7.99

Kwickasfuki Jizz – Will update image to reality once someone sends me a cool pic 🙂

green_jizz

 

Jizz Machine YELLOW £7.99

Yellow Jizz straight from the banana shop – Will update image to reality once someone sends me a cool pic 🙂

yello_jizz

 

Jizz Machine PINK £7.99

One on the Pink Jizz – Its more ‘fuscia’ than baby pink. Will update image to reality once someone sends me a cool pic 🙂

pink_jizz

 

Jizz Machine Metallic GREY £7.99

The most OE and flexible of all colours. LOW STOCK

silver

 

Limited Edition Jizz Machine Reflective Gold £10.99

Only for the pimpest of Strip Club rides, this mirrored gold Jizz sticker is the must have for seedy champagne events. Perhaps add some leapard print for true Stringfellow authenticity.

gold

 

Limited Edition Chrome Jizz £10.99

Ever wondered what your face looks like reflected in mirrored Jizz? Well now you can find out with the special edition Mirror Jizz sticker from JizzMachine.com

Jizz_Mirror

 

Jizz Machine BLACK £7.99

Black Jizz, the ultimate in Stealth Fluids.

black_jizz

 

Jizz Machine RED £7.99

Le Rouge de Jizz. Luscious scarlet curves for the fans of the juicy red jizz.

redJizz

 

Jizz Machine ORANGE £7.99 LOW STOCK

Vibrant citrus jizzy flavours combine in the ‘Beast’ colour we see before us.

orangeJizz

 

VlogHim! White £5.80

Out of stock.

vloghim

 

Baron Von Grumble Sticker WHITE £7

The Classic fan support service – original white BvG

helmetwhite

 

Baron Von Grumble Sticker BLACK £7

Inverted BvG modelled here on a toaster coupled with a yeasty spread.

 

Other Bread Heating machinery available.

Other Bread Heating machinery available.

MOTOLOOT KEY TAGS: HERE!

Baron_Von_Grumble_key_tag_grande Baron_Von_Grumble_keychain_grande

 

44Teeth Decals available in the swag shop! 44MERCH!

44t_gold

44t_colour

  108 comments for “Shop

  1. Balloaks
    September 14, 2014 at 6:15 pm
    • WpPrRz
      September 15, 2014 at 6:36 pm

      Listen here you toss. Nobody cares about Pheed. Don’t come ruin Baron’s pretty website with your links.

      • Benny
        September 25, 2014 at 6:34 pm

        I second that, Jizz off with your double bloody Pheed shit!

  2. Northernstrommer
    September 14, 2014 at 7:01 pm

    Baron,

    just ordered two of the reflective gold for my RF900R project. I will send you pics once its finally getting there.
    thanks for these they are gunna set it off perfectly. keep going man, we need you around lad.

    thanks again.

    • BaronVonGrumble
      September 14, 2014 at 7:03 pm

      Sounds awesome and be sure to send me the pics!

  3. James Pendry
    September 14, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    Met you at Brands at the start of the season! I won the day with Ducati from Bike Channel, I told you I wanted a sticker 5 months ago! Better late than never I guess!

    I’ll send a pic of the sticker when it’s on =]

  4. Donal
    September 14, 2014 at 7:26 pm

    Just ordered a few stickers, Jizz Machine for the back of the helmet! And Jizz Machine & BVG stickers for the PC for editing inspiration when I get time to edit my footage and get my channel moving!

    Best of luck with the new ventures Baron, exciting times ahead!

  5. Mark
    September 14, 2014 at 7:51 pm

    Hi Boron just ordered some stickers will send you some pic when they are on!

  6. September 14, 2014 at 7:57 pm

    My Dorso 750 is going to look mint with that gold sticker 🙂

  7. darren
    September 14, 2014 at 8:13 pm

    Just bought the gold sticker. Looks the boy! Can’t wait to get in on the bike

  8. Ben
    September 14, 2014 at 8:30 pm

    Couple of gold ones should suit my street triple r nicely

    Cheers Baron x

  9. brian connors
    September 14, 2014 at 8:50 pm

    You are awesome Baron

    i love all your videos and purchased my S1000R right after watching the barnstormer video. i am only 6’1 but i do not have any of the wind sperm (lol) problems you mentioned but i do not have the optional wind shield that was on your test bike either. I love the the bike and am buying a Jizz stcker for it now.

    Thank you for doing all your lovely videos and posting them for others to enjoy.

    I love every thing about you and every word.

    Your honesty is a breath of fresh air…..thanks and kindest regards

    Brian

  10. Mr Plussed
    September 14, 2014 at 9:36 pm

    Your efforts at bringing dubious stickers to the two-wheeled fraternity are appreciated, but why when I select a ‘Jizz Machine ORANGE £7’ do I get a ‘JizzMachine WHITE’ added to my cart?

  11. MotoWunder
    September 14, 2014 at 9:44 pm

    Jizz mate…. Jizz mate!

  12. Duke Ryden
    September 14, 2014 at 10:09 pm

    Outstanding baron! cant wait to receive my order, they look jizz tastic!

    Hope my machine is worthy! http://p1.bikepics.com/2014/07/25/bikepics-2685553-full.jpg

  13. September 14, 2014 at 10:17 pm

    Bought 3 different colors. Thanks for these! My Diavel will love them.

  14. Euan
    September 14, 2014 at 10:41 pm

    Photo will follow. it may surprise you!!!

  15. Jizztastic
    September 14, 2014 at 11:08 pm

    Is these will be for sale in april for my 17th ill buy a shitload of them and put them On hopefully my aprilia rs 125 2 stroke jizz machine right there

  16. Andrew
    September 14, 2014 at 11:19 pm

    Ordering a white one for my s1000rr 🙂

  17. Clarke
    September 15, 2014 at 12:32 am

    Do you ship to the US?

  18. Epperlein
    September 15, 2014 at 1:03 am

    Hello Baron,
    My father and I are great fans, directly from Brazil!
    Bought some Jizz machine stickers to put on our Race bikes!
    Going to send some pictures , and hopefully they can make it to the Gallery of Jizz!
    cheers

  19. Mikey
    September 15, 2014 at 1:15 am

    To the great Baron, i want to get some stickers but you dont have a shipping cost tagged in. I dont want you to get “boned” with shipping costs to the states. Thanks!

  20. Druff
    September 15, 2014 at 11:37 am

    Ordered a couple for a ’77 GS550 Cafe I’ve been building for the last 18 months! I think this will make it Jizztastic! Stick with it ole chap, the world is a brighter place with double bloody deckers!

  21. J
    September 15, 2014 at 12:47 pm

    BVG – little glitch….when you order an orange Jizz Machine it adds a white to the basket.

  22. liljoe
    September 15, 2014 at 12:57 pm

    Just ordered a couple of stickers, keep up the good work as always baron
    I’ll post up a pic of them on my rsv when they arrive.
    Cheers

  23. SwallowtailJack
    September 15, 2014 at 2:32 pm

    Just bought 2 of the gold reflective stickers for the bike, not sure where to put them but brilliant! just looking for more ways to offend the local people…

  24. bonkersonabandit
    September 15, 2014 at 3:29 pm

    just treated myself to that lovely jizz sticker, when it arrives i’ll stick it on the bandit and send you a pic.

  25. Curtis Bowden
    September 15, 2014 at 7:41 pm

    I’ll be ordering some gold ones soon.

    Got a SV650 I’m converting to a racer to do track days!

    Would go for a 1000 but only 16.

  26. Stevef4r
    September 15, 2014 at 8:35 pm

    Hi baron these will be on my s1000r a jizz machine by your own description. Glad your back.

  27. Dennis-W
    September 15, 2014 at 9:00 pm

    How big are these jizz machine stickers?
    I’m afraid they won’t fit on my 50cc 25kph jizz machine peugeot scooter.

  28. Pedro Mendes
    September 15, 2014 at 9:56 pm

    Hi Baron

    Just order one gold jizz machine and a white Baron Von Grumble when they getting were i send you some pictures.

    greetings
    from Portugal

    • Pedro Silva
      September 17, 2014 at 12:14 am

      Olá Pedro de onde és? Deviamos ser os embaixadores do BvG em Portugal 😀

      Hey Baron… can we be your ambassadors in Portugal? 😛

      • Pedro Mendes
        September 17, 2014 at 11:14 pm

        Ola Pedro Silva
        Sou de Lisboa e tu?
        Acho muito boa ideia vamos para a frente com isso!!

        Baron let’s go ambassadors in Portugal!!! KKKKK 😀

  29. Vagina Flaps
    September 15, 2014 at 10:00 pm

    Hey Baron. Do you think you could post some pictures of the stickers in all the colors? I’d really like to see the red ones, but I just want to make sure it would mach my bike :3 Thanks

    • BaronVonGrumble
      September 16, 2014 at 3:26 pm

      yep – i’m on the case with that now 🙂

  30. September 16, 2014 at 12:01 am

    I heard the call of the Jizz and knew I had to have a set.

    Gonna get them on my TLR and gonna get my photo on!

    BVG, keep making those vids too. I love your point of difference and you’re a funny bugger.

  31. Island_Mystic
    September 16, 2014 at 4:11 pm

    Just ordered two white and a silver. Should look great and offensive on my ZX-6R here in the States! Thanks Baron!

  32. September 16, 2014 at 9:51 pm

    Heya Baron, I hope I don’t sound like a bit of a jizzdribble here but not all of us have these sexy machines, some not even motor powered. Would you ever consider a slow Jizz Machine page for the non red light jumping, idiot cunts on bicycles?

    Also I’ll be ordering some stickers soon!

  33. Pedro Silva
    September 17, 2014 at 12:13 am

    Heya BvG

    just ordered some stickers to Portugal..
    I’ll spread the word around 🙂

    cheers mate
    all the best

  34. Scott
    September 17, 2014 at 1:15 pm

    Gold and Red Jizz ordered – Great stuff, keep up the good work!

  35. Dan
    September 17, 2014 at 1:28 pm

    Stickers purchased for my Jizz Machine, when i added an Orange Jizz to my cart, it came up as White. Legit or Illuminati?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      September 17, 2014 at 4:29 pm

      OH MY! thank you – this was a bug – all fixed now 🙂

  36. Macky89
    September 17, 2014 at 5:22 pm

    Ordered for my little Jizz machine!

    Its not the size that matters, its how you ise it right?

  37. Sharpy
    September 17, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    Heya Baron im a man of my word! Ordered one of each colour, couldnt choose which will look best on my bike and helm 🙂

    So many flavours of jizz im spoilt for choice 🙂

  38. phil "lionheart" berry
    September 17, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    Can’t wait to get your sticky jizz on the side of my helmet

  39. Paul ashcroft
    September 18, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    Are they all the same size? Please send dimensions.

    Ta

  40. pettandj
    September 21, 2014 at 6:29 pm

    Just bought two stickers to yamaha/jizzmachine. Can’t wait to get them!

  41. Joe
    September 21, 2014 at 9:58 pm

    Idea for a show….

    …..how about a BVG initials sticker

  42. Zedfragg
    September 23, 2014 at 11:08 pm

    Is it bad that I want to buy one of these and stick it on my other halfs back when out shopping?
    I guess I’ll settle for sticking one on the motorcycle!

  43. Zedfragg
    September 24, 2014 at 5:01 pm

    Mr Von Grumble!

    May I ask, where did you go to get these decals created?
    I had an incident earlier removing some decals, they decided they’d miss the blue metallic paint on the fairing a bit too much so pulled the paint off!

    So, on replacing ’em with a carbon set I thought I’d like my own design on the bike but google doesn’t like me and I have trouble finding anywhere that looks…Trustable (That’s a word!)

    Cheers for any insight matey

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 1, 2014 at 6:19 pm

      Digital Sign FX – as for Dan, say Baron sent you 🙂

  44. Lennard
    September 24, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    I have the same helmet that is in the image with the red sticker! Shoei XR 1100
    It looks sick on the Black visor… So i have to get one 😉

  45. Vince
    September 25, 2014 at 2:35 pm

    What are the stickes made out of?

  46. john
    September 28, 2014 at 8:22 am

    hi there can you get the stickers in half size

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 1, 2014 at 4:56 pm

      maybe… but i need to do minimum runs…

  47. Penny Marais
    October 2, 2014 at 11:15 am

    Hi Baron,

    Is it possible to arrange for a shipment to South Africa? how would that all work?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 8, 2014 at 2:04 pm

      just add your address and shipping is free 🙂

  48. October 9, 2014 at 2:57 am

    Baron will you be doing these in neon green as it’ll match the scheme of my bike ?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 9, 2014 at 12:24 pm

      Yep – once the current batch is sold – i’ll do some other colours etc 🙂

  49. Heidi
    October 9, 2014 at 9:49 am

    C’mon, wheres the pink?! Surely the Baron can cater for his female fans ;)!

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 9, 2014 at 12:24 pm

      Most girls are fed up with Pink! Although, i love pink… so maybe.. 😉
      I’m going to do a new run when all the ones i have have sold so will include some new colours.

      • Heidi
        October 9, 2014 at 12:30 pm

        Don’t let me down Mr Grumble!

  50. Harvey
    October 9, 2014 at 9:49 pm

    Hi – Will you be getting the red stickers in again?
    Take care out there

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 18, 2014 at 12:36 pm

      Yes, should have them by Thursday so if you order, potentially i can post on Friday 🙂

  51. aaron
    October 12, 2014 at 1:41 pm

    Any chance of red coming back into stock? need one asap

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 18, 2014 at 12:36 pm

      yes, if you order it it ill be on the list for delivery – i should be getting more on Thursday, so potentially could post Friday 🙂

      • aaron
        October 28, 2014 at 12:33 pm

        cannot order it, due to the red one been out of stack still 🙁

  52. emptyrepublic
    October 12, 2014 at 2:45 pm

    Baron, can you ship to Thailand? PayPal is being dickish and not letting me choose Thailand as a shipping country.

    • BaronVonGrumble
      October 18, 2014 at 12:35 pm

      Yep! ALL postage is included in the price already, wherever you are in the world. Easier that way, i win some, i lose some but its far more simple.

  53. Design_Hammer
    October 15, 2014 at 4:22 am

    First year of my Masters Degree here in Detroit and your videos have been a nice break from the insanity. I appreciate your humor…. good stuff. Thanks Baron..!

  54. ROCCAT
    October 22, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    Is the red sticker out of stock forever?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      November 9, 2014 at 7:36 am

      no – they are in now – i’ve just not updated the list! 🙂

  55. Theo
    October 23, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    Hi Baron,

    Hi Baron,

    A friend gave me a Jizz Machine sticker as a present. But there is a problem…
    The problem is, my bike is red, so they got me a black sticker. But when I put it on (after I would peel off the sticky layer) the sticker is not backwards… (it should be backwards, right?)
    So if I put it on like I am supposed to, the result will be the sticker being on my bike, but backwards…
    I really don’t like the idea of that.

    Am I doing things wrong? Or did they maybe order a sticker for a windshield, instead of on for putting on the fairings? (They ordered the black one that is displayed on the helmet in one of the pictures)
    Do I need to order a new one, this one I could use for my car, since that is also a Jizz Machine! 😀

    Best regards,

    Theo de Wit
    (from The Netherlands)

  56. Ryan
    October 25, 2014 at 9:01 am

    Just ordered the baron and jizz sticker. Love what you’re doing baron! Huge fan!

  57. October 26, 2014 at 4:26 pm

    Do you know when the red Jizz Machine Stickers will be back? Because who doesn’t love some bloody Jizz…

    • October 26, 2014 at 4:28 pm

      Never mind… just saw they could possibly be back for Friday. Now I feel like a double bloody idiot! ;D

  58. Julian Sperling
    October 27, 2014 at 10:19 pm

    Hey Baron when can I order the red jizz ?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      November 9, 2014 at 7:40 am

      now 🙂

      • Julian Sperling
        November 12, 2014 at 2:40 pm

        I ordered a white one a while ago….didn’t get it so far….I’m gonna order a red one today and hope for it to arrive soon 🙂

  59. Justin
    October 31, 2014 at 12:30 am

    Hey Grumble, any chance of a gold foil “Baron Von Grumble” sticker making a come back? Cheers mate

    • BaronVonGrumble
      November 9, 2014 at 7:39 am

      if you mean the mirrored ones – they are in stock now 🙂

      • Justin
        November 26, 2014 at 5:11 am

        Oh, not the Jizz Machine one, I meant like the one on your fireblade? Looks great on the carbon kevlar!

  60. aaron
    November 3, 2014 at 9:43 pm

    red still cannot be ordered.

  61. Tom
    November 4, 2014 at 10:15 pm

    Hey Baron!
    I’m entirely new to motorcycling, but I’m absolutely loving it so far (despite almost being killed a few times already!) Just recieved one of your stickers for my little Yamaha MT-125 (brilliant wee bike) that I picked up a couple of weeks ago! Still a little bit bad at riding, but you got to start somewhere, and I’m getting the hang of it fast! As much as the little Yamaha is a small bike, to me it is as equally jizzable as a 1000cc leader bike; I mean, how can you not cherish and love your first bike?! I look forward to many years of riding, and an excellent experience as part of the great motorcycling community! I love your content; very entertaining and very inspirational, so keep up the fantastic work you do!
    Ride safe and have fun,
    Tom

    • Rhodri
      November 26, 2014 at 2:15 am

      Hi mate,
      I too have an MT125 and also have a jizz sticker on it, its absolutely gorgeous bike for a 125. Have you added any mods to yours yet?
      Rhodri 🙂

  62. Dicky
    November 6, 2014 at 11:01 am

    Baron,

    Just bought some gold reflective stickers and they have arrived through the post already with your lovely gold handwriting on the envelope. I’m gonna stick them on my 899 panigale when I get it in spring next year off the back of your recommendation. Your review kickstarted my desire to get one, and the dream is about to become a reality… So thanks for that dude!

    Remember – stay cool….

  63. Gordo
    November 9, 2014 at 5:33 pm

    hi baron, how do you upload pics on here as i have a Aprilia Tuareg 125 24 years old and i would like to upload on here if anyone knows??

  64. Lloyd
    November 11, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Hey BvG. I see you said the vlog him stickers are back but how can I order them? Can’t find them anywhere. Want to get 3 stickers as well. Do you combine post?!

  65. Mark barney
    November 13, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    Just ordered two red jizz tastic stickers, and I’m going to put them on my wr450f supermoto jizz machine. Possibly the rims?.
    Thanks for all the laughs barron.

    Barron von god.

  66. Banks
    December 3, 2014 at 2:13 pm

    Vlog him stickers…… When will they be available BvG?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      December 7, 2014 at 12:00 pm

      Now! just need to add a button 🙂

  67. liljoe
    December 17, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    Had to order more for the track bikes. pics to follow, multi jizz

  68. Wayne
    December 23, 2014 at 3:21 pm

    Any chance on blue Jizz? Royal blue to be specific.

  69. tizwaz66
    December 23, 2014 at 7:05 pm

    thanks just ordered your sticker from your website hope you have a great xmas and a great new year all the best

  70. Joshua
    January 2, 2015 at 11:54 pm

    Hey Baron, can we get a Kawi green variant? Thanks!

    • chzy
      January 4, 2015 at 7:48 pm

      that’d be so sick

  71. Lorraine
    January 6, 2015 at 9:49 pm

    Mr. BVG would you be doing any more of the vlog him stickers?

    • BaronVonGrumble
      February 19, 2015 at 11:31 pm

      got some in now! fresh off the press 🙂

  72. Josh Perry
    January 11, 2015 at 9:56 pm

    Love your videos….makes me want to ride! Had to have some stickers for my jizz machine’s!…. 2006 SV 1000s….also have 2009 er6n….love the twins!

  73. Michael
    January 25, 2015 at 6:35 am

    Thanks Baron Von U-Turn – I picked up three stickers. Vids rock! Keep on keepin’ on my friend from across the pond!

  74. TwoWheelLoo
    January 31, 2015 at 5:10 am

    Needs me some “Vlog Him!” stickies!!!

    • BaronVonGrumble
      February 19, 2015 at 11:25 pm

      in the shop now finally! 🙂

  75. Lloyd
    February 4, 2015 at 2:19 am

    Ok have officially given up waiting on vlog him stickers.

    • BaronVonGrumble
      February 19, 2015 at 11:24 pm

      in the shop now!!!!!! 🙂

  76. Lloyd
    February 4, 2015 at 9:24 pm

    Hi, I ordered a red ‘Jizz Machine’ sticker on Tuesday 27th Jan 15. Do you know when I should expect this? Thanks

    • BaronVonGrumble
      February 19, 2015 at 11:24 pm

      hi Llyod, sorry bud, we had a backlog! you should be set now?? let me know if any issues

  77. charlie
    October 12, 2015 at 3:47 pm

    I sort of want one that don’t know if my 125 is worthy enough

  78. gal
    October 19, 2015 at 11:14 am

    i ordered Gold Jizz Ltd Ed in 18 Aug 2015 didnt get it yet i send email no respond

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